I realized my motivations for one of the major turning points wasn’t strong enough. But I had to get my heroine, Gemma, to abandon everything she knows to join the hero back to his home country. So instead of leaving to keep her home safe, I’ve forced her to leave because her home doesn’t exist anymore (for lack of better explanation, and I don’t want to give spoilers!)

But I’m struggling with how much darker the story has become. I normally don’t write this morbid, but it makes the motivation strong enough for the character. One particular scene had me in tears as I wrote it, but it was crucial.

The reason I’m so concerned is this doesn’t fit the standards of the current publisher I work with. Selling this story could prove to be more difficult than I’d like.

Writers: have you ever experienced something like this? Where a story morphs into a different genre or tone before your eyes? How do you handle it? Or maybe I should finish the thing first and worry about those issues later. Hm, conundrum.

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My writing muse is firmly stuck in dozing mode. Normally, this is frustrating enough. Yet a few other writing friends of mine are also stuck. In either initial first draft, edits, or the dreaded (but interesting problem) of second-book-curse-oritis.

Aha! Solution: writing retreat. The last one was a great cure to kicking the muse in gear. One can only assume another writing retreat will do the same. Yay! Problem solved.

Oh. Wait. Another dilemma. Finances are critically low. Writing retreats involve overnight stays, which means hotel rates, food, even travel costs depending on how far it is. And my family doesn’t have that luxury right now. Probably not for another 2 or 3 months.

Ok. So we’ll need to condense our ‘retreat’ into a full day. No overnight stays. But where can we go where we’ll be out of the way, free from distraction, and free to brainstorm with each other in peace?  Somewhere that doesn’t cost much, if anything.

I’d hate to take up an entire section of a coffee house for a whole day. I’m sure we’d be kicked out after 2 or 3 hours. Outdoors is too unpredictable – weather, visitors, etc. Hm.

Thoughts anyone?

This was a lot of fun, and the story keeps getting better and better!! I LOVE this group!

Four manuscripts- either waiting in the wings or on my laptop.

Eight months of writing  and revising this particular manuscript.

A year of querying and rejection.

Fourteen full or partial manuscript requests from either agents or editors.

What do all of these equal?

I will be a published author!!

Yes, folks. I received ‘the call.’ Or in my case, ‘the email.’

I sold AUDREY’S PROMISE to The Wild Rose Press.

No release date yet, but as soon as I have it I’ll announce that.

And for anyone who knows me, they know what comes next:

Happy Dance time!

Happy Dance

But it’s been a good few weeks as far as writing goes. In a business full of rejection, and the lovely habits of swallowing those rejections week after week, it’s good to know my story and voice has reached a few people.

A few people who are veterans in this business.

But I can’t let this get to my head. I must get back to writing. As often as I can, with the lovely trials and challenges of every day life.

For those of who who’ve asked, the family situation I alluded to earlier this year has still not been resolved. But we’re closer. One way or another, I’ll make it happen and we’ll be the better for it. Even if I must set some things aside, and change a few goals, I can do it. And I know my writing will be there waiting, no matter where we are.

But I know you all understand. Family and health come first.

Sadly, this also means I haven’t been able to write much either. If it weren’t for the Writer’s Retreat I participated in the second weekend of January, my word count for the month would be a big fat ZERO.

Speaking of writer’s retreats, I highly recommend one for you fellow writers out there. We didn’t want to spend a lot of money or be too far from home, so we went to a local lake and rented a small cabin. January and February are off-season for those places, so you can get some INSANE deals, which we did. Over half off.

So wherever you are, you can always find those kinds of tucked-away places to get you away from your normal grind, without spending too much or being too far away if an emergency pops up.

Thanks to the two incredible ladies who joined me~ I hope to partake in another one soon!

God willing.

I’ve been that way most of my life. Planned, organized, driven and directed. I owe a lot of that to my parents, my discipline with diving, and of course my husband.

But I’m changing things up this year.

Because I have to.

Now, for the entire year, I have 1 goal:

Go with the flow.

And mind the rocks.

Wrapped up in this 1 goal are a trillion little things to help achieve this. Not sweating the small things, don’t fight the rapids, take one day at a time, keep smiling… all those clichéd statements.

My mantra: I am not in control, and that’s ok.

Do what I think is right and see what happens. That’s all I can do.

Because when I think about, I already have everything I need. The things that make me a better person are already in my life. Why change that?

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I’m certain next year will bring some struggles for us, and we’re ready for them. But at the same time, I’m grateful for every minute I have.

I learned a lot this past year. About myself, as a mother, a writer, a friend- what I’m made of, things I can take, and areas I’m not as strong as I thought I was. And, incredibly, areas in which I’m stronger than I gave myself credit for. I may kick, scream, cry, beat myself to a pulp, but in uncertain situations in which I have no qualifications or control, by God I can adapt.

I have an amazing family and forgiving friends who put up with me during those moments. Who build me up when I need it and have a drink with me when I celebrate.

I know now is when most people create goals for the next year, and in previous years that’s exactly what I did. But right now I look back on 2012 and shake my head in amazement.

I cry for the losses of loved ones (still), I rejoice in magnanimous moments of others, and I marvel at the capabilities of the human spirit. How resilient my son is and no matter how difficult something is or how sick he feels, he’s still such a happy kid who loves with his whole heart without reservations. And how much better a person I am because of him. Because of my family.

So instead of a toast to 2013 and what is to come, I raise a glass to 2012. You threw a hefty test as us, and we’re still here. I’m still trudging forward with writing, with the plans our family made, and handling the curveballs you whizzed at us. With the sours, there were plenty of sweets. And I have one hell of a sweet tooth.

Like a particular chapter I’m writing in my latest WIP. To be honest, I’m stuck. I can’t capture the right emotion in words and stick it on the page. And perhaps it’s because my inner conscience is telling me the scene isn’t going the right way and I need to steer it in a different direction entirely.

But I remember a scene in another manuscript I wrote where I pulled anger from one very vivid memory stuck in my mind. Which is what I think most great writers do. They use some of their experiences to portray emotion.

And anytime I need to write a scene full of pure anger, I go back to that one memory. It’s a very personal memory that took several years to get over, but I remember it so vividly that it’s easy for me to pull from. The time I was the most enraged I’d ever been (even to this day) and relive it in my mind. Needless to say, I can’t be near anyone when I do this, because it puts me in a very bad mood. But I pull from the emotions and write what comes to me through the character.

Obviously, the scene may require tweaking afterwards, but it’s the main way I can make sure the emotion is there.

Writers: what do you do to invoke the right level of emotion in a scene? Do you remember the moment in your life that you were the most enraged or the most hurt? Does it help to pull from those memories, or just piss you off more?

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Paper – Reams and reams of it. Because we go through that much. Either for brainstorming, rough drafts, character sketching, revisions (*raises hand*) or querying. We use a lot of it.

Ink – See paper. (With one caveat: it is essential to know the kind of printer the writer has, of course).

Coffee – Most writers need this fully stocked in IV bags. But don’t get them needles- that requires a prescription.

Dragon Dictate Software – For writers on the go, moving around a lot, this will help. You’ll need to find out if they have a PC or Mac. Downside: it’s a bit pricey.

Srivener – A fantastic new software that most writers love, no matter what they write (fiction or non fiction).

Pens – Like paper and ink, we use these a lot, and therefore run out of ink in the middle of jotting down a great idea, and then chuck the pen across the room, chipping our favorite coffee mug while we desperately search for lipstick or marker to write down said-great-idea before we lose it.

Coffee Mugs – To Replace said-broken-mug from above.

 The Latest Edition of Writer’s Market – This may be baffling for those of you who are not in publishing, but this is the first step to a golden ticket in the Willy Wonka’s Factory of Publishing.

Elements of Style from Strunk & White  – See note above.

Books – Duh. Bonus points for knowing which genre they prefer, but they’ll pretty much take anything. Especially books on writing or autobiographies from serious writers. (FYI- Snooki’s recent book does not count).

Comfy Clothes – Any funny shirt or pants specific for writers. There are so many websites offering screen-printed quotes on shirts like ‘Don’t Piss Me Off Or I’ll Kill You In My Novel’ or ‘Grammar Snob.’ We need something comfortable to write in and what better way to be motivated to write than to wear the reminder. CafePress has some great ones.

Slippers or Socks – See clothes. No writer can write with cold feet.

Computer Accessories – A laptop case, wireless mouse/keyboard, thumb drive. Again, helpful to know what kind of computer they have to make sure the case fits. But a thumb drive is universal. As are screen cleaners and cans of air to blast out the dust from our keyboards.

The Writer’s Block – Nuff said.

Lap Table – A bunch of different kinds, depending on whether they like classic wooden, or contemporary chic, or funky bumbo style. But a cup holder is essential.

Air Fresheners or Wickless Candles – For writers who spend hours sitting in one spot desperate to get the dialogue out of their brains, sometimes we tend to forget to shower. Something to mask the stench in the air is helpful (Scentsy is popular). But nothing that includes a flame where we’ll forget to blow it out and burn down our masterpieces.

Massage – To force us out of the house and relax our writing muscles. Spa gift cards are a great way to achieve this.

Magazine Subscription  – Writer’s Digest, Writer’s Journal, The Writer (any of these are precious jewels in the mailbox).

Don’t bother with these:

Journals – Every writer has a million of these shoved away in drawers and closets. Don’t add to their clutter. Plus, it’s a cliché. Lesson #1: all writers hate clichés.

Laptop – Come on! These are so freakin’ expensive, with way too many variables that are too personal to each individual writer. Unless you want to take them to the store to pick out their own, don’t do it. They’ll just end up exchanging it for something that suits their query personality more. It’s like women and shoes. We’re just too picky.

E-Readers – See laptop. Though gift cards to purchase e-books are good.

Thesaurus – Again, every write already has one. And every good writer knows not to use it.

Digital Voice Recorder – Every phone has something that meets this need. My iPhone came with 3 of them. And there’s about 30 more apps they can download for free.

Hopefully this gives you some ideas. Have a great holiday!

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